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When cancer treatments are over .. picking up the pieces ...
After cancer treatments are completed, many people hope their life will return to very much as before … picking up where they left off and feeling relieved the treatments are over. However, for many people this does not happen easily or as anticipated and many are left feeling unsettled and confused as to why …
This subject has been raised by various members on this site, at varied time-points along their treatment journey. For some this has been nearing the end of treatments, for others years after their treatments are completed.
For examples of members' stories, see Helena’s post in ‘FORUM>General Click Chat’ as she speaks of her concerns in ‘Moving On – The New Normal’; SueB’s comments in her ‘Blog’ titled ‘I wonder what ‘Normal’ is?’; BeeMGee in ‘FORUM>Introduce Yourself’ with her entry ‘Hi I’m Bev’; SusanS describes her struggles in her ‘Blog’ titled ‘Got the blues’, and Nada has expressed her thoughts in her recent ‘Blog’ entry ‘It Doesn’t Feel Like It’s Over’ .
These are only a few examples, with similar comments made by many members in chat sessions or private messages as well.
Accepting the changes ..
Many people feel a strong sense of guilt when they find themselves struggling to feel positive or comfortable with life after cancer treatment. Shouldn’t you feel better about things? Friends, family and even health professionals often assume you will feel relieved and happy to have completed the intense phase of treatments ... shouldn’t you now be able to get back to your regular routines with home, work and social activities, and no longer need as much of their help and support? Although many people are relieved, there may be an accompanying sense of uncertainty as regular contact with the health team ceases, family and friends step back, and the unknown future stretches before you.
This time may be filled with mixed emotions. The relief and joy of finishing intense treatments may conflict with feelings of fear, doubt, loneliness, helplessness and/or resentment that time has been lost and your life has changed. Facing cancer often means facing our own mortality, and you may experience a new sense of vulnerability and insecurity.
If any of these feelings occur for you, acknowledging and accepting them as part of the healing process is very powerful in helping to recover. Also know you are not alone - this occurs far more often than many people realize as many people are reluctant to admit they are struggling when the worst seems to be over.
Quotes from our Clickchat session on this topic:
“ .. everyone else’s life has moved along normally and it’s like mine was frozen in time”
“ .. I just want life to be normal again and to be treated by others as normal”
“ .. I feel stuck .. it’s hard to find the motivation to do things”
… for hints from fellow Clickers provided in our Clickchat discussions on “Picking Up the Pieces” – see FORUM ‘Clickers’ Helpful Hints & Advice for each other > Clickchat advice‘
A booklet published by the Cancer Council titled ‘Life after Cancer – A guide for cancer survivors’ is available to view in our ‘Documents’ section – direct link:http://www.breastcancerclick.com.au/documents/245/27/life-after-cancer-a-guide-for
**Acknowledging your feelings is the first step, then use this as a trigger to take more stepstowards improving your situation. Seeking help - which may be in the form of counselling or other avenues like joining new groups (support, hobby, exercise, dance, craft, etc). If ongoing specific concerns (e.g. body image, sexuality, menopause symptoms), seeking appropriate resources to address this may be tremendously beneficial.
Many people don’t know where to start. Talking with others often helps to identify the main underlying aspects of concern for you - especially with those who really understand what you're experiencing. Discussing further with friends, family, Breast Care Nurse, GP, counsellor or psychologist helps with gaining support and finding solutions.
A tremendous gift to give yourself (and those around you) is to take those steps, and plan for a better tomorrow .. after all, you deserve it!
"I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship."
- Louisa May Alcott
Useful resources (provided at little to no cost):
In WA, Breast Cancer Care WA
A WA charity that provides emotional, practical and financial support and care to people affected by breast cancer
Ph: (08) 9324 3703
http://www.breastcancer.org.au/
In WA, Breast Cancer Clinical Psychology Service (WA)
A free counselling service for adults affected by breast cancer and their families in WA.
Ph: (08) 9224 1629
Australia-wide: Cancer Council
Information and support for people with cancer and their families anywhere in Australia, and can provide information on services in your area
Ph: Helpline 131120 (cost of local call)
Your GP may also recommend relevant services for you
We'd love to hear any comments or ideas on this subject. Please add below ...
Love Glenys (Click Breast Care Nurse) xx
This post was edited by Glenys at May 20, 2013 1:14:44 AM WATime"The Click Breast Care Nurse 
